Donny’s my neighbor–fuck, I’ve had a crush on him for so damn long. Still, straight, married and five kids? What chance did I have with a breeder like that? Still, he was nice enough, and he wasn’t a homophobe or anything. Still, the few times I got drunk enough to risk a come on he shot me down pretty hard–even refusing a god damn blow job. 

It was pretty hopeless, but then I happened upon this strange shop at the mall, a place called Spells ‘R Us. Just one of those curio shops–figurines, knockoffs, though I had to admit that it was pretty high end as far as kitch went. I struck up a conversation with the shop owner, and before I knew it, he was ringing me up for a cigar of all things.

Crazy–I wasn’t a smoker. I didn’t know anyone who smoked. And here I was, one cigar, nothing else, I took it home, put it on the table, and the doorbell rang, and there was Donny, here to return some tools he’d borrowed the other day.

I invited him in for a beer, he saw the cigar, and I told him he could smoke it if he wanted to–and the next thing I knew, we were upstairs in my bed, his cock buried deep in my hole–it was everything I’d ever wanted and more–but the story didn’t end there…