I actually have a pretty good picture saved that might work well for this one…
Category: Uncategorized
A cigar infomercial that changes people into dumb, redneck slobs y/n?

Caption or story where jerk son orders pizza and forces step father (the delivery guy) to deliver it and show off to friends how much better off he is than his father. Role reversal with weight gain and class shift (like the caste system) where the son and friends become thralls to the step father?
I like the idea of it, but it might need a few tweaks. I’ll keep it in mind though.

It’s that time again. Got a burning question? A story, idea or a photo for inspiration? You know where to put them.
Also, three more captions today!
Coach Ray Gets Framed (Part 5)
One moment, Julian was there, and then the next, he wasn’t–or maybe he still was feet away from him, but Ray just couldn’t see him. The calm ebbed away, and the sheer terror of what Julian had just told him sank into his bones. After everything he’d seen today, after everything he’d just been through, he knew this was no bluff. If Noah went home–hell, if Noah stepped out of the house–then Ray knew he was done for. He’d be the one taking the fall. He’d be the one going to prison, and he had no doubt that Julian’s control of him ran deep enough that his time there–as a registered sex offender and pervert–would be horrific. He heard the water turn off in the bathroom, and he thought about his basement. He almost never used it–it had been a workshop at one point, but he’d never had much time for his long list of projects, especially now after his divorce. What in the hell could be down there, that Julian thought might help him? He knew he didn’t have time to go investigate, not with Noah about to step out at any moment, but he also didn’t know how to get Noah down there without alerting him that something was awry.
The bathroom door open, and the stench of fresh piss immediately derailed Ray’s thoughts, sending his cock to half mast. Half of him wanted to lunge forward, but his rational mind won out, and he took a few steps back, staring at Noah in the doorway, just as filthy as before. “What..Did…did you even take a shower? I heard the water running–”
“Yeah coach, I took a shower,” Noah said, matter of factly, but it was clear he hadn’t given himself the kind of shower he’d intended to. Either he was simply oblivious–which was likely–or Julian had ruined his mind in more ways than Ray might have thought. Then again, those two possibilites weren’t mutually exclusive either.
“Noah…Noah, look at yourself.”
The young man did, staring down at his sweaty body, freshly soaked in his own piss, and it was clear he was trying to make sense of what was going on. “I…I turned on the water. I even remember getting…under it, it was warm, and…and delicious…oh fuck…did I?”
He took off towards the stairs, away from Ray. “Noah–Noah!” Ray shouted and took off after him, “Noah wait!”
“Fuck this!” he shouted, “This shit is fucked, I just want to go home!”
Ray didn’t know what to do. He had to keep him here, he had to, no matter what. That was the only way he could buy himself enough time to figure out how to expose Julian and get his own life back. A thought occurred to him, and he hated himself for even considering it–but what choice did he have? Noah…Noah would understand, once all of this was over, why he did it, wouldn’t he? He’d have done the same thing if he was in Ray’s position.
Noah got to the door, was trying to work the locks with his trembling hands, and Ray didn’t stop–slamming into him, shoving him up against the door, his entire body pressed to Noah’s. The smell of him, especially the fresh piss, nearly drove him out of his mind, humping his cock against Noah’s ass. For a few moments, Noah kept trying to work the lock, but his hand slipped away as he groaned, allowing his coach to spin him around, grab his face, and pull it into his chest, feeling Noah lick up his sweat and chew at his nipples.
Focus, he had to focus. The basement, get to the damn basement! He fought the urge to just give in there, and fuck the pig right on the floor, seed his ass all over again, maybe…maybe even give him a shower of his own, since the little bitch liked being stinking wet so much. He pulled away, shocked by his own thoughts, but now that Noah had gotten another taste of his coach’s filthy body, he was advancing, drool dripping down his bearded chin, eyes slack. “Coach…fuck…why?” he muttered, but he couldn’t stop–and Ray backed away, leading him towards the back of the house towards the laundry room, and down the stairway into the basement below.
He flipped on the light, but went down backwards, so he could keep an eye on Noah, and make sure he followed. Everything went smoothly at first, but Noah stumbled about halfway down, tumbling right into coach, knocking them both down the rest of the flight where they landed on the dusty ground, Noah on top, and he went back to licking him clean, grinding his own hard cock against his coach’s thigh, while Ray tried to recover from his daze. Looking around, him trying not to think about how fucking good Noah smelled right now, he could see that his basement was no longer a workshop–no, at some point it had been converted into a very well equipped sex dungeon. He just stared at the racks and tables, unable to imagine how all of this could have gotten here without him knowing it, but there was Julian, in the center of the room, holding a metal collar in his hands. A short chain was attached to it, leading to the cement floor where it was attached. Julian set it down, and vanished once more.
The cruelty was welling up in him again, he could feel it. He forced his way out from under Noah, who crawled after him towards the center of Ray’s new dungeon until they reached the collar–he allowed Noah to chew and suck at one of his armpits, while he picked the metal collar up and examined it with his other hand. It had an open padlock hooked in it, all he had to do was get it around Noah’s neck, close the hinge, and lock it. Could…he really do this to him? Did he have a choice? Trying not to think too hard about it, he slipped it around Noah’s neck, the young man barely aware of what he was doing but powerless to stop him anyway, and then he clicked the padlock into place.
Coach Ray Gets Framed (Part 4)
The coach was behind him, and he hadn’t looked around–but he heard Ray stand up, and he whirled around, fear locked in his eyes, but when he saw his coach, he relaxed a bit. “C-Coach? Oh god, did he get you too? Is he here?”
“Is who here, Noah?” Ray asked, happy to avoid the subject of why they were both naked in his kitchen.
“Master Porter, is he here?”
“He was, but he left.”
Noah swore, and then broke down into tears, shivering and shaking, “Oh fuck, it’s not fucking over, why can’t it just be over!”
“Noah, it’s just us!” Ray said, “I saw him leave.”
“He doesn’t leave,” Noah shouted, “We just can’t fucking see him!” He stood up and put his back to the wall, looking all around the room, “We can’t see him, but he’s always there, of fucking Christ! Just leave me alone! I said I was sorry, please!” He screamed the last words at the empty room, to nowhere in particular, “Please, please…”
Ray was torn. He wanted to comfort him, but he also knew that if he got too close…he didn’t want to get trapped in a cycle like the one he’d just experienced. Instead, he got Noah to focus on him, and together they did a breathing exercise he’d taught the team to help them calm down and focus, in order to recover from a mistake. About five minutes later, both of them felt marginally better.
Noah looked out the window, and started to laugh, “My parents are going to be worried sick, I should have been home hours ago.”
Ray wasn’t sure what he meant. “Noah…you’ve been missing for about three months.” Noah just stared at him, and Ray wasn’t sure what to add. “It’s June, Noah. School ended a few days ago. No one has seen you since March.”
“But I just…I remember walking home, and then Master was there and I had to follow him. Then…then I was here,” Noah said.
“You don’t…remember anything?”
“Oh god, I have to get home!” Noah said, and headed for the front door, “My parents, they must be worried sick.” He grabbed his own clothes and threw them on as quickly as he could, and then headed for the front of the house.
Ray hurried after him, “Noah, wait! You…hold on, you can’t go, please, just listen to me,” Ray said, and managed to get between him in the door, but too close. Both of them caught a whiff of each other, and quickly backed away, the sudden flame of desire reignited. “You can’t…go home looking like that.”
“Noah looked down at himself then, and saw his body. What he was wearing, his gut. He grabbed the flab, unable to believe it was real. “I…when did…”
“We can figure this out Noah, please, just trust me.”
Noah looked up at him, “Please coach, just let me go home…don’t help him.”
“I’m not helping him.”
Noah didn’t say anything, but it was clear he didn’t believe him.
“Noah, you have to understand. He’s trying to frame me for this! If he can implicate me instead, then I’ll go to jail, and that fucker will get his job back, and who knows how many people he’ll do this to. Please, Noah, just trust me on this…help me.”
“I just want to go home,” Noah said, crying again.
“I know.”
“Can I at least call them?”
Ray shook his head. “I can’t trust you Noah. I can’t trust that you would tell the truth. I can’t even trust that I would tell the truth, if the police knocked on the door right now. We have to stay here. Look, let’s…let’s take some showers, and that’ll…help. Then we can figure out what to do, alright?”
Noah looked at the front door behind his coach, and then nodded. “I guess…I shouldn’t show up smelling like this.”
Ray smiled, and at a distance, showed Noah to the bathroom, heard the water start up. He turned to head for his bedroom, only to find the hallway blocked by none other than Julian Porter. Ray tried to shout, tried to run at him and attack him, but Julian spoke first, “Calm, Coach.”
Immediately a perfect euphoria swept over him, and he nearly fell to the floor as his muscles lost all their tension. He only managed to stay upright by leaning against the wall beside him.
“That’s better. We wouldn’t want to disturb Noah, now would we? The boy’s in such a fragile state, after that…brutal fucking you gave him down there. I had no idea you could be such a beast!”
“You…did this…to us…” Ray managed to say, but his tongue didn’t want to work that hard.
“Oh, let’s not focus on the past, Ray! You need to realize, that Noah here is never going to want to stay here. He’s going to want to get home, and as soon as he does, I promise you, he’ll tell his parents everything about how you’re the real abuser here. And like you just worried, if the police question you? You’ll spill the bean yourself, and then you’ll be going to jail for a very, very long time. And trust me, in jail? You’re going to spend a lot of time begging for cock, I guarantee it.”
“Ya…fuck…”
“Don’t worry Ray, if I wanted you to go to jail, I wouldn’t have gone to this much effort. No, what you need is right down in the basement. You’ll know what to do.”
Coach Ray Gets Framed (Part 3)
Ray didn’t notice that Porter had cum down Noah’s throat. He didn’t hear him leave, his entire mind had been overwhelmed with the athlete’s musk. His cock was so hard and leaking, but…but he couldn’t cum. He knew if he could just cum, maybe his mind would clear, but instead, the raging horniness only dragged him in deeper. Without warning, Noah’s cock released a torrent of piss into his spandex, sending Ray’s senses in overdrive–he lost track of what happened after that, the two of them ripping each other’s clothes off their bodies, writhing around in the puddle of piss and sweat on the kitchen floor.
The more of a taste he got, the rougher Ray felt himself becoming, and he sensed Noah slowly relenting to his dominance, the young man presenting his ass to his coach, grinding it against the older man’s thick cock, grunting and mewling, neither of them capable of stringing together a sentence. Still, Ray relented as long as he could, desperately trying anything else to cum, but he only grew more certain that what he wanted–what he needed–was to fuck Noah. The drive overwhelmed him eventually. He shoved Noah down onto his stomach in the middle of the piss, climbed on top of him, and as soon as he penetrated that loose hole, something changed.
Thinking back, he struggled for a way to describe what, exactly, he experienced, each time he fucked Noah. On one hand, it felt like he was suddenly wearing colored glasses–nothing had really changed, but everything appeared to be completely different. This didn’t seem to fully capture what he experienced however. It was also like being lost in the woods and utterly certain you have been walking east…only to discover, in a moment, that your whole orientation was utterly wrong, and you’d been travelling West the whole time. A deep sense of vertigo and disorientation. Still, even that couldn’t capture the sensation that he was no longer himself. Not only had he been travelling in the wrong direction, he hadn’t even been the right person travelling in the wrong direction.
What all this meant, is that as soon as his cock had slid inside Noah, his head popping through his cherry, a cruel sneer evolved across the coach’s face, he dug his hands into Noah’s hips, hard enough to bruise, and drove his cock in deeper with a roar, flinging spittle across the boy’s back. “Yeah you fucking pig, you fucking piece of shit!” he screamed, “Take your master’s cock, fucking take it!” Ray (if he even was Ray at that moment, which isn’t how he had felt) wanted to hurt him, wanted to tear into him. Wanted to cause pain and humiliation, wanted to ruin him. Beneath him, Noah simply snorted and grunted mindlessly, slamming his hips and ass back to meet his coach’s brutal thrusts, face smearing across the filthy tile, eyes glassy wide. Noah came first, and Ray didn’t even notice, his entire mind focused on his own pleasure, on destroying this disgusting pig he was fucking. He had kept up the stream of obscenities for a few minutes, but now Ray was simply yelling his voice raw, biting and scratching at Noah’s back, a few deep enough to draw blood, before with a deep howl, he finally spilled his seed deep in Noah’s guts, but kept slamming into him, until his softening cock popped free, and it was like everything shifted back all at once, and he was himself again.
He scrambled backwards, away from Noah–who was still lolling in the puddle of piss, his hole leaking his coach’s cum, and the entire event felt like a dream to Ray. Noah had been unaffected by the sudden absence of his coach’s cock–he was still licking at the piss coated tile, eyes rolled back in pleasure, bucking his hips into the floor. Ray could remember doing everything, could remember everything he’d thought and said but he hadn’t wanted to do any of it. He hadn’t wanted to, and yet he had. And as much as he hated it, as much as he tried to deny it, he’d…liked it. He’d liked it enough to think, just for a moment, about crawling back over there and…and mounting that whore’s fat ass all over again, really working to make that pig squeal this time. He caught himself falling forward, and instead threw himself back against the cabinets behind, hard enough for his head to smart. Taking a few breaths, he finally managed a soft, “N-Noah?” his voice hoarse. “Noah!” He tried again a bit louder.
He didn’t get an answer, and so Ray just sat there, fifteen feet away, his back to the counter, trying to figure out what he was going to do. He’d just molested one of his own students. Worse, he’d put on a show that, had anyone seen him perform it, would incriminate him for certain. He looked around the room–Julian had invaded his house, but had he set up cameras? Was this his plan? He grabbed his clothes where he’d thrown them, feeling horribly vulnerable and exposed. Sure, they were filthy, but having his shirt, jockstrap and shorts back on also made him feel…safe. As he tried to figure out what he could possibly do to convince anyone he’d been set up, Noah slowly began to calm down, his sighs of pleasure and lust becoming gasps. He finally picked himself up out of the puddle, on his hands and knees, looked around and asked, “Oh god, now where am I?”
Coach Ray Gets Framed (Part 2)
Noah charged at Ray, bent low for a tackle. The coach managed to slip to the side, and Noah glanced off him, unable to get a solid grip. He moved away as Noah slammed into the wall behind him, and he kept the kitchen island between them. “Noah,” he said, “Noah, where…where have you been? Everyone’s been worried sick about you.”
“Coach, I fucked up man, I fucked up. I’m a fuck up!” Noah said, slamming his head against the wall, “Fuck! He’s in my head and I know it but you smell so fucking good, I…I gotta…” he turned and started stalking toward him and Ray maneuvered around the island, keeping it between them. They made two circuits when he saw the third person watching him from the other side of the room–Julian Porter.
“You! What the fuck have you done to him?” Ray said, still slipping around the island as Noah pursued him.
Porter didn’t say anything, he just watched them for a moment, and then said, “Coach, remove sensory block Alpha.”
It hit him like a brick, the stink in the room. He didn’t know what it was, and he was momentarily distracted, searching for the foul odor. It reeked like a locker room, like a bar bathroom, a month old cumrag. Noah took advantage of the coach’s confusion, dove over the narrow section of the island, and pulled the coach close to him, shoving his face into Ray’s chest, snorting and licking at his shirt…his…filthy fucking shirt.
It was then that Ray realized where the stench was coming from–it was coming from him. Suppressing a gag, he wrenched himself away from Noah, looking down at himself. His usually white shirt was stained brown and yellow with who knew what, the black mesh shorts he was wearing didn’t have as much visible evidence, but they felt crispy, as did the jockstrap he was wearing, though he was too terrified to look at it. “What…how the fucking…what the fuck is this?” he screamed at Porter.
“Oh, you’ve been wearing those clothes for over a month straight now. Cumming into them. Pissing into them. Working out in them.” He smiled wide, “What, don’t you…remember?” The emphasis on that last word, the way Porter drew it out long, chilled Ray, but Noah had climbed off the counter and ran at him–this time Ray wasn’t so lucky to dodge him. Noah hit him square in the chest, driving him back against the counter, and they both toppled to the floor, Noah on top of him, snorting into his shirt, at his pits, licking at his face, all the while grinding against Ray’s body. The spandex shorts he had on did nothing to disguise how hard the young man’s cock was, and Ray tried to shove him off, but he was too heavy.
“What the fuck, get him off me!”
“Now coach, you’ve been looking so hard for Noah, aren’t you happy to see him?”
“You fucking piece of shit, what the fuck did you do?”
Porter didn’t answer right away. He walked over, his feet on both sides of Ray’s head. He unzipped his fly, pulled out his cock, and Noah immediately sucked it into his maw, the whole of his weight planted on Ray’s chest, still grinding against him. “You fucked up a good thing of mine, Ray, a real good thing I had going. All the fresh meat I could want, and none of them even knew about it! A victimless crime, since none of them even knew they were victims. And really, I have you to thank–you, were the one who told them to take my computer science courses! They were easy A’s, you’d say. I mean, I might have had a small hand in that recommendation of yours, sure, but my classes were easy for your sexiest athletes. I never flunked a student of mine if they were sucking my cock. This one got a bit wise to it, but he would have settled back down if you hadn’t stuck your dirty nose in my business, coach.”
Something was wrong with him. He kept trying to struggle out from under Noah, but this close to him, he could actually smell…smell him, how filthy he was, and it was making him hard. He wormed his way down, but only managed to get his head locked between Noah’s thick thighs, the spandex coated with sweat, and then he couldn’t get ary further. In terror, he realized his mouth was open and licking at the student’s spandex clad taint, one his hands down the front of his shorts, massaging his cock which had grown inexplicably hard.
“Oh, very good coach, I see you’re already adjusting to your programming rather well.”
Programming? His mind flashed back to his computer in his office, how even this afternoon he’d fallen asleep at the keyboard. It hadn’t been the first time. In fact he’d…been doing that a lot lately. He’d always just passed it off as stress and exhaustion, as worry over Noah. He’d been thinking about Noah so much, about how much he missed him, about how much he wanted him. He pushed himself back up, rubbing his own scruffy face against the athlete’s cock, sucking at the cum crusted spandex, thinking about all of the fantasies, all the desires he’d kept bottled up for so long. No! No, these weren’t his! They weren’t his, but they felt so…real. They felt just like his own thoughts, they felt so authentic, this desire. How did he know it wasn’t real?
“Amazing, isn’t it? Just a big computer, you know, stuck in all of our heads. So easy to…fry a few circuits if you know what you’re doing. Lucky for us, I know what I’m doing, right coach?” He fucked Noah’s mouth a bit deeper, his breathing a bit ragged, “Still, I know how…deeply you care for Noah here, I know you’ve always wanted him as yours, and so, as a sign of how much I respect your filthy, dirty nose, I’m going to give him to you. Sure am going to miss this mouth of his though. Still, you should be careful with him–I wouldn’t want to be caught with a runaway teen, you know, especially after your…connection to all of that child abuse happening at the high school. I mean, the only person who had as much contact with those students as I did was, well, you.”

Request by Anonymous
Hey, have you got a second–
Yeah, I know you don’t have much time for fags like me, but…
*click*
Why don’t you go sit down on that bed over there, hang out for a bit.
Oh I know you were heading to wrestling practice, I can see you in your singlet under those sweats. Why don’t you take those off, hang out for a bit with me?
Yeah, that’s it. Cuss me out all you want, but I know how much you like that body of yours, all hard muscle, top to bottom. Go on, you can rub yourself for a bit–trust me, it’s the last chance you’ll have in a while.
*click*
You can feel it can’t you? That shift? It’s already starting, those abs of yours getting swallowed up by that new gut of yours. No no, don’t stop rubbing yourself, trust me, you’ll enjoy being a fatty just as much as you loved your muscles before, you fucking pig.
Yeah, did that catch you off guard pig? There it is again, that whimper. Your cock hard yet? Don’t lie, I can see it straining that spandex, pig. Words sure do have power, don’t they? I’m damn tired of you calling me a fag, but I have a feeling you’re going to love your new title pig…
Oh? did you just cum? Just you wait.
*click*
Yeah, you’re getting bigger alright.
How big? Do you really want to know?
Five hundred pounds.
Yeah, that’s right, five hundred. Hairy too–look at how fast that beard of yours has filled in, damn. That spandex is growing with you, don’t worry–after all, you won’t be wearing anything else. Oh, everyone else will think it’s normal, seeing you waddle around in that thing–they’ll think you’re disgusting sure, but that’ll only turn you on more. I’m the only one who’ll know any different, you see. We’re the only one’s who’ll remember you being anything beyond a fat, hairy, filthy pig.
Oh, speaking of filthy…
*click*
Damn, get a whiff of that funk rolling off you. Go on, lift that arm, get a whiff of yourself pig–damn, another load already? I can see the cum dribbling through the uniform, down between those massive, stinking thighs. Don’t worry, the ass is ripped out, gives me easy access, but you’ll have to piss through the front–I don’t think you’ll mind too much, though, after all, you like being filthy, I can see it in your eyes. Deny it all you want.
Only one more change to go. Pretty soon, you’re going to be a faggot just like me. My slave. My fat, horny, stupid pig slave. Oh, you’ll remember who you were, sure, but you’ll never want to change back. You’ll love being my pig too much to even consider it. Well, shall we?
*click*
How does that feel, Master?
No, wait…that’s…oh fuck, did I…I fucking reversed our names, how the fuck–I just have to be quick–
Yes…sir…I won’t touch it sir.
Yes sir, I was a bad faggot sir, I’m sorry.
What kind of punishment, sir?
Make…make me a pig like…you? I…please sir, I don’t–
Yes, I understand. It would…be an honor to be your dirty sowboi, I…agree completely. Thank you for the honor sir, I’ll have the changes ready to go within an hour.
Oh, after I suck your cock and eat out your ass? Of course sir, your pleasure is the most important thing in the world! Thank you for letting me serve you sir, thank you for everything.

Broad idea suggested by an Anonymous ask, but this caption is also related to this caption.
Jerry knew he was getting close to figuring out the secret to Pigtown. The guys at the precinct all told him he was crazy to try and stop it, to try and figure out what the bar was doing to the men in the neighborhood. They even pointed out Scrimm, told him that story, but Jerry was never one to listen to threats–that is, until he came home one evening and discovered his sons were missing.
He and his wife searched for days, the entire police force was mobilized, but there was no sign of them anywhere–no one claimed responsibility, no one demanded ransom. But Jerry knew, Pigtown was involved somehow, but he didn’t know why or how. He’d always found himself able to resist the advances of the men there–was that why they were targeting him? He told the precinct Chief his theory, but the older man wouldn’t–or perhaps couldn’t–say anything. His eyes thought, told Jerry all he needed to know.
His wife broke down–she left for her mother’s, and Jerry carried on by himself for another day, before he finally received the gift, and the note.
If you want to be with your boys, you know what to do.
–Rod
That’s all it said. He opened the small box, and inside he found a small cigar and a lighter, but nothing else, no clue or anything. Should he report it? Rod–he’d come across that name over and over again in his investigations, but he had no idea who he might be. But what choice did he have? It was just a cigar, and he’d been able to resist so much else, right?
Jerry was a very different man a couple hours later. The cigar–it just kept growing, and at this point it was stretching his jaw to the limit, but he’d only suck down more smoke, twisting his now massive nipples, stroking his white beard, growing thicker and longer. He didn’t know when his clothes had become leather, but fuck, it felt good on his bare skin, on his massive cock, but as much as he stroked it, he couldn’t seem to climax–and then the doorbell rang.
There, on the stoop, was a cage. And there inside the cage were his two sons. They were naked, but otherwise completely unharmed, but Jerry knew what to do. With strange, inhuman strength, he dragged the cage into his house, his two sons screaming at him to stop, but as soon as he started feeding them his smoke, they changed their tunes rapidly, and their bodies too–both of them becoming chubby, perfectly obedient cigar cubs for their daddy, happy to be home in his arms.
His wife never did see any of them again, but some of the officers at precinct 17 would on occasion, in a dark corner of a bar or alley. Jerry wore a thick metal collar, as did his two cubs–the two boys attached to their father’s collar by two short, thick chains, assuring them that they’d never be apart again, Jerry’s cigar still smoldering in the dark, as big as ever, and unlikely to go out anytime soon.