I guess this is a multi-part question. Are you in a long-term relationship with anybody, and if you are, how much do they know about the stuff you write? Are they interested in it as well, or do they just accept it as a part of you? Did you specifically look for somebody who had similar turn-ons?

Yes, I’ve been with my husband for close to ten years now, and married for around eight. He knows about the stuff I write, but is not particularly interested or turned on by it, but it doesn’t bother him that I write it. Our kinks are very different, but, the relationship works for us. I wasn’t looking for someone to match my kinks with by any means. 

It’s a bit of a struggle, I suppose, trying to figure out how to balance the sexual and the romantic. I had a very, very awful experience with a dom who was extremely abusive, which really put me off from pursuing real life kink experiences for many years, and for a lot of other reasons, sex has always been difficult for me. It’s only been in the last couple of years, that I’ve been able to step out a bit and expand myself sexually, both with him and others, after we both felt comfortable opening up our relationship.