Animal Impersonations won both polls, but a decent number wanted some X rated content, so why don’t we make some dirty animals?
*SNAP*
Jared shook his head, and looked around, trying to remember where he was, and what he was doing. The lights were hot on him, and he could see the audience laid out in front of him, and most everyone was snickering, and a few were laughing outright–especially the other frat brothers in the audience. He looked next to him, and Dr. Watch was standing there, smiling kindly at him. “Well Jared, what do you think now? Think hypnosis is real?” he asked.
Jared felt like his memories were falling into line now, and he remembered what had happened, how Dr. Watch had told him he’d be able to hypnotise him just by touching his forehead with a single finger. It had been absurd, of course–not only was hypnotism complete bullshit, but even if it was possible, there was no way something so simplistic would work on him. Sure enough, it hadn’t worked! He could remember now, it was just a moment ago that Dr. Watch had tapped his forehead, and just like he’d thought, nothing had happened at all. “No way, I told you, I can’t be hypnotized–especially not with a finger.”
The whole audience erupted in laughter–and Jared smirked, assuming they were all laughing at the failure of a hypnotist, but the grin didn’t fade from Dr. Watch’s face…and a slight sense of doubt began to creep into his mind.
“Well Jared, then maybe you could explain why you aren’t wearing any clothes?”
Jared’s eyes went wide, and he looked down at himself, the audience still roaring with laughter, and sure enough–he was completely naked. He…he had been wearing clothes, hadn’t he? He looked around, but they were nowhere to be seen on the stage. How could that be possible? There had to be some reason, right? Like it had been waiting for the question, a reason came to him immediately, and as ridiculous as it sounded to him, he also knew, with complete certainty, that it was the naked truth. “Because…because I’m an animal, and…animals don’t wear clothes, of course.”
The room erupted with even more laughter, and even though Jared was certain it was perfectly reasonable, he felt his cheeks burn with embarrassment. Something about this was wrong. He could remember wearing clothes, certainly, but he also knew that him, an animal, wearing clothes was a preposterous thing to even consider. The dissonance was giving him a headache–all he wanted to do was get off the stage, and get some fresh air, but he couldn’t budge either of his feet an inch.
“Ah, well that certainly makes sense to me!” Dr. Watch said, rolling his eyes to the audience, “But be more specific for me, Jared–what kind of animal are you?”
He knew this. He was…human, right? No–no, that wasn’t right, a voice said immediately. Humans were animals, sure, but they wore clothes. He was…different, but what was he again? He should know, the answer was in his head, but locked away somewhere he couldn’t reach. “I…don’t remember.”
“Well, we can help remind you, can’t we everyone?” Dr. Watch said, “Alright everyone, on the count of three. One…Two…Three!”
“Monkeyboy!” the audience screamed at him, and Jared felt something inside him take over. He fell forward, catching himself with his hands, crouched over awkwardly, and he started grunting and howling like a monkey, one hand scratching his armpit as he did. Inside his head, Jared was horrified at himself, but it…it was just who he was! What choice did he have? He tried to ask Dr. Watch what was wrong with him, but he couldn’t get any words out, and Dr. Watch just patted him on the head, and sushed him.
“Now now, Monkeyboy–I know what you need. Ollie, would you come up please?” One of the folk from the town stepped forward, eyes glazed over. He looked to be a trucker, was was none too clean–but he was fully clothed. “Now Ollie, you have a couple of bananas don’t you? We talked about that earlier.”
Ollie nodded, and the entire audience started cackling.
“Well, the Monkeyboy over here is hungry–would you do me a favor and feed him your bananas?”
Ollie nodded, then went back, sat down in his chair, and started undoing his boots. Jared was confused, but when he pulled off his sock, he understood–because where Ollie’s foot should be, there was just the most delicious looking banana he’d ever seen. He loped over, grunting the whole way, got down and started licking at Ollie’s bananas, confused by the flavor a bit, while the entire audience just watched the burly frat brother slather his tongue all over Ollie’s filthy feet. But the laughter subsided somewhat, as people began to notice that something about Jared seemed…strange. The hair on his body was thicker somehow, and his uncomfortable stoop looked a bit more natural, suddenly, like his arms had gotten longer, or his legs shorter, or a bit of both.
“That’s very good, Monkeyboy,” Dr. Watch said, “But you have a favorite banana of your own, don’t you?”
Jared nodded, the hair closing in around his face, eyes a bit rounder, lips pushed out a bit, and he bent over, the audience gasped as Jared curled around and began sucking on his own cock, right in front of the entire room. The rest of the frat in particular were horrified watching this, but none of them could get up from their seats. The hypnotist swung his watch, catching the light and sending the flickers back into the room, watching the audience settle in and begin laughing and clapping again. Dr. Watch had never lost an audience, after all, and he wasn’t about to lose this one.
He left Jared to his favorite banana, and called forward Adam and Roger, both of whom were also naked, and still dazed. He snapped his fingers, and the two woke up, looking confused. “Alright everyone, why don’t we help out our other two animals here? You all know what to say, don’t you?”
So, what sorts of animals should Roger and Adam become? No pups or pigs though, sorry, I’d rather try some animals I don’t write as often.
- Cow-boy
- Gator-boy
- Donkey-boy
- Rat-Boy
I added a fourth option, since there will be two winners to this poll!
Bracken's Corner 