I was just wondering- is it tough being such a pretentious douchebag? This entire chain of posts today just makes you look like the most smug piece of shit, and all because you wanted to make some weird comment about capitalism in response to a very simple question about your fucking dream job. I don’t believe you’re actually personable enough to handle a Q&A day if this is how you end up treating people.

*Shrug*

Hold on a sec, and let’s flip this. What kind of person do you have to be to see a author who writes smut make a side comment about capitalism, and feel like you need to go out of your way to put a question in their inbox being super smug and condescending about it? I mean, why do that? 

Why do this, even? Why ask this thing up there? I mean, you clearly realize I don’t feel much shame about what I say on here. It’s clear I don’t have much tolerance for concern trolling or arguments about politeness or being personable. What exactly are you expecting?

You don’t have to respond to my weird comments. No one is making you put these things in my box. Why are you doing this? Why?

Have you considered that maybe I’m giving you what you want? That you want me to be rude, so that you can feel good about being a better person than I am? So you can unfollow me, or block me, but come crawling back to read my shit anyway? Let’s get brutal here, let’s lay the whole truth out–you know what my reply is going to be before you even send this.

Suppose, for a second, I responded with remorse. “Yes yes, you’ve shamed me, yes yes, I was wrong to say this shit that I said.”

Would you feel as good if I did? Would you feel better than you do now, smug in the satisfaction that you have the moral high ground here?

Why do I reply like this? Because this is what you’re expecting. This is why you say things like this. Here, maybe I can split the difference:

MY OFFICIAL STATEMENT

“Yes, I’m sorry to have offended anyone. I should know better than to try and get into complex linguistic and philosophical arguments with anons online, because they never end well, and I come off looking like a jerk, and no one wants to be seen as a jerk. Still, I can only reply to these things, and I swear to reply honestly to all of them. I can’t help it if someone is wrong, but perhaps, in the future, I’ll try to be more polite about it.”

There, do you feel good? I hope so. I just want you to be happy with yourself. That’s what everyone like you wants, right?