Twenty minutes, long enough to pop down to the campus store, pick up some cigars and pull out some cash to pay for his date. As he walked over, he was suddenly struck by how natural this all felt, but just a short time ago, if someone had told him that after having a fight with his boyfriend he would call up and actually buy sex from a prostitute, he would have probably gone white in the face and thought they were the devil. And yet, here he was, buying some cigars, lighting one up immediately, happy with smoke in his lungs again. God, he hated that he loved it. Even if…even if things did change back, he didn’t think he’d be able to keep away from the damn nicotine. Still, the possibility of things changing back seemed like quite the long shot, but he had to hope for something. James was still out there, other people might have escaped. Still, if they were going to tell the authorities, wouldn’t they have done something by now, the national guard rolling into campus, shooting rubber bullets and tazers? Actually, he didn’t really want to be on the wrong side of that, if that did happen, still, if not that, then what?
He pulled some cash out of his bank account, finding a bit less in there than he’d thought he’d had. With a sigh, he figured their little company should pick up another contract with the school for some construction cash–it was his major after all–but working with Tom on a project was about as much fun as living with him. Leon and Butch–they helped mellow him out a bit, but the whole experience usually just boiled down to Tom ordering everyone else around and doing barely any work himself. God, Matt hated all of this. He hated this campus, this body, these urges, this relationship, this whole goddamn life. The anger was starting to spoil his mood as he came up on the baths–he’d been excited for his meet-up with the cub, but only because it was a way of getting back at Tom. He didn’t really feel like having sex though, a fact which had caused the whole argument to begin with, but he’d made the commitment, and had the money, so he might as well try to have a little fun.
He checked his watch as he came up on the baths, one of the new additions to campus, taking the place of the swim center. There was still a pool in there–somewhere–but it had been expanded and grown to include a huge complex of saunas and locker rooms which never seemed to end, and which was the most popular sex spot on campus. At least he didn’t have to take a contract to clean the baths–they paid shit, and you never knew what nasty thing you might find in there. Of course, the students who did take those contracts probably thought that was just a perk of the job–but Matt had no interest in that. He meandered about, early, wondering whether he should go in and head to his locker, or just wait for the cub to arrive. He decided to wait–the inside of the place was such a mess, he’d probably never find him if they went in separately.
He didn’t have to wait long– a few minutes later a familiar silhouette came strutting down the walk towards him, dressed in some tight leather shorts, cupping that amazing ass which was just as hot as Matt remembered, and a leather harness hugging his chest in all the right places. “Hey daddy,” the cub said, grabbing Matt’s collar and giving him a deep kiss, teasing Matt into taking his tongue and shoving it down the cub’s throat. “So, should we get a room?” the cub added with a grin when they parted, and Matt led the way into the building. The baths were sparsely occupied–normal for a weekday during classes, and in the first empty room they found, Matt dragged to cub in, shoved him up against the wall and started breathing smoke down his throat, but the cub pushed him off. “Hold up there daddy, I take my payment up front–keeps you bears from dining and dashing.”
“Sure, whatever,” Matt said, grabbed the fifty bucks from his pocket and tucked it down the front of the cub’s shorts, and then started kissing him again, the cub undoing the straps of Matt’s overalls and letting them drop to the floor, rubbing his hands over the bear’s furry, taut gut, before Matt wrapped his arms around the cub and pulled him close, rubbing their bellies together.
The cub eventually pulled away, unzipping the rear of his leather shorts and bending over a bench, showing off his cherry to Matt. “Well come on daddy, give me another fuck like that one before, make sure I remember this one just as well.”
“You fucking slut, I’m gonna rip it apart,” Matt said, got down behind the cub, and quickly realized that one thing in the room wasn’t feeling the mood–his cock. He could only get it half-mast, and couldn’t even work it into the cub’s well practiced hole. “God–God fucking damn it,” he said, backing away red in the face, about to pull up his overalls and spare himself to embarrassment of trying anymore. He’d bottomed for Tom so much, maybe he’d just forgotten how to top. He should just go back and let Tom have his way with him–and just try to forget about all of this crap, and just get used to it. Get used to being Tom’s lackey, his sex toy, his employee, his fucking bitch.
“Hey hey, what’s up daddy, what’s the matter?” the cub said, coming over.
“Look, just forget it, alright? Keep the money, this was a stupid idea–I should just go.”
“Here, let me work on it for a bit, I can get it up–” the cub said, getting down on his knees, ready to suck him off, but Matt gave a growl, palmed the cub’s head with his massive hand and shoved him away, harder than he’d intended, so that the cub flew backwards, his head hitting the concrete floor with a loud smack.
“Oh shit,” Matt said, getting down quickly, “I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry–are you alright?”
“You fucking asshole, a fucking ‘no’ would have been enough!” the cub shouted, clutching the back of his head.
“Look, I just still don’t know my own strength, and–”
“Fucking forget it–and you know what?” the cub said, wobbling upright, “that fuck we had? Fucking mediocre–you’re a shitty top, for the fucking record.” He headed for the door, still uncertain on his feet, leaving Matt on his knees, feeling even worse than before, and before he could stop himself, he was sobbing, feeling more alone than ever before. It would be so much easier if he could just forget who he’d. Just forget like everyone else had, apparently. He felt like he was the only one who could remember it all from before–who knows, maybe he was the only one. Every day felt like an act, like he was pretending to be someone he wasn’t, stuck in a costume he couldn’t take off, and he loved it, or part of him loved it–and he hated himself for loving it more each passing day.
He didn’t know how long the cub had been standing there, watching him cry from the doorway. But he looked up and there he was again, still angry and rubbing the back of his head, but there was something unreadable on his face as well, an anxiety and confusion and hesitancy which didn’t suit him all that well. When he noticed him, Matt had no idea what to say. “Look, I’m really sorry, I am–I know I’m a shitty top, I just needed some space from my boyfriend, and–”
“Look, I don’t care,” the cub said, “What did you say earlier, when you got down on the ground after you pushed me?”
“What?”
“What did you say?”
“I…I said…I don’t know my own strength, sometimes.”
“Why did you say that?”
Matt didn’t say anything. He’d just given up the game–what could he even say to that?
“Look, this is…this is important. Just tell me, why did you say that? I’m not–I’m not going to think you’re crazy, I swear–I just…just tell me, alright?”
“Because, well, a month ago, I wasn’t…well, I wasn’t this strong,” Matt said sheepishly, feeling silly, but the cub rushed over.
“Fuck, you remember, don’t you. You do! God, I thought I was the only fucking one.”
Matt just gaped at him. It couldn’t be true, it just couldn’t. “Look, I’m just–I just have to go. I need to go make up with Tom, and tell him I’m sorry, and then we need to fuck, and I can just get this all out of my system,” he said, mostly to himself, but the cub dragged him back down.
“Tell me,” he said.
“Tell you what?”
“Tell me who you were. Tell me what you remember. I don’t…I don’t have much, and I…I don’t want to just disappear. Just tell me, please. I won’t tell anyone, I just have to know I’m not crazy. I have to know that what happened actually happened, tell me who you were, please.”
Matt told him–everything he could remember. It felt strange telling it to someone else–he’d told himself the story so many times that he might as well have just imagined it. But telling someone else, it made it real again. He told the cub about who he’d been, how he’d been a devout Christian, how he’d hidden away in his room like a few others once the changes had started sweeping through campus, and the cub listened to all of it, never interrupting, not asking any questions, just listening. Matt finished off by telling how he’d been changed during the poker game, but petered out before the point where he’d fucked the cub.
As soon as Matt finished, the dam broke, and the cub gushed out his own story. His name, it came out, was Terry, and he’d been an art student. He’d changed on the second day, when he’d come into one of his art classes and discovered that, instead of drawing, he was going to be the nude model for the class. However, as the teacher sketched him, he found his body frozen, changing to match what the bear of a teacher was drawing, not the otherway around. The professor had turned him into a cub, desperate for a fuck, and he’d fucked and sucked his way through the entire room, his appetite insatiable. He’d had so many bears since then he’d lost track, though at fifty dollars an hour, he was sitting very pretty as far as money went, even if he hated what his body made him do. He told Matt that, over the past week, the memories had started fading a bit. He hadn’t been able to sleep, for fear of losing that little bit of his old self still left, but telling Matt his story, it all came rushing back, stronger than ever, little details popping out for him to recall–his mother’s name, the town where he’d grown up, his first girlfriend.
Somewhere in the story, Matt leaned in and kissed the cub again, and after a moment of hesitation, the cub kissed him back. Matt didn’t have any problems performing this time around, and he clutched the cub close, sitting on the bench, Terry bouncing up and down on his thick cock, both of them kissing and crying and happier to have found someone else who remembered.
Bracken's Corner 